Moving Day

Tomorrow (a Friday, by the way) is moving day (as you might have guessed)! Oh, yes. Between the hesitant, "this friday" to the unsure, "no, the next one", we have finally decided to get moving the HELL over with.

To say I am simply ecstatic about such... spontaneous a decision, though... is... very much the lie of the century.

I hate stuffing my junk into stupid cardboard boxes, hitching the road, and finally slumping over onto the floor only to reopen said stupid cardboard boxes full of said junk. Ugh. Disgusting, tiring process.... seriously.

Anyways, considering that this may (very possibly) be my last blog post for a while, I decided, heck yeah, I SHOULD do my loyal (cough) readers (cough cough) some justice...

...right?

(Readers yell, "NOOOO!" in the background)

...right.

So here it is: my very last blog post for... God knows how long.

Thursday, June 27th, 2008.

Hot, sticky, and incredibly drowsy.

Sofia and I were standing outside near my usual waiting spot, waiting, of course, for my dear, darling mumsy to pick me up from school. There was a satay vendor to our left, and soft, slightly annoying bursts of wind kept messing my freshly cut hair; sweeping my fringe into my eyes, making me, "tsk" in irritation.

The gentle aroma of smoked fish-on-a-stick kept caressing my nostrils, teasing coyly my all ready starving stomach.

There we waited. Me and Sofia. Talking... Waiting. Standing. Waiting. Waiting. Waiting.

Nine -- oops, scratch that -- eight minutes passed 1pm.

Where the hell was she?

Sofia turned to me, a sort of smug expression on her face as she said, "I can so not imagine you walking." (or something equally close to the lines, laa)

I fumed.

"Of COURSE I can walk!" I replied, rising to the bait like a stupid, worm-on-a-hook swallowing fish. "Come on -- I'll show you!"

And so... after hardly any thought (five minutes of hesitancy is NOTHING compared to my usual 2.5 hours), Sofia and I walked.

At the peak of the day. Through the heat. The sweat. The humidity.

By, God.

I. WALKED.

GASP!!!

So, anyways, walking... walking. We met up with Kai Jing and no sooner added him to our group of walkin'... rebellions (in this modern world of airplanes and cars and stuff, we HAD to be rebellions to have been feet-walking our way across the street!)! We parted ways (with Kai Jing) in a while, of course, and from there... continued walking.

Walking. Walking. Nothing interesting. Walking. Walking.

Oooh, whats this? A little puppy! Golden Labrador-looking! Aww. Adorable.

Walking. Walking.

Wait.

Whats this??

Is that puppy FOLLOWING us?!

By golly, it was!

Sofia was freaking out. I myself was a tad... unsure. I mean, its not as if we had touched it or anything -- and its not as if us touching it (or should I say, "her"?) been a sin, because, after all, it was completely dry.

Nonetheless. I was in quite the fix.

Me picking it up and gently ordering it to stay put where it was would most DEFINITELY look bad to them wondering eyes. Especially the exceptionally "alim" ones. Oh, yes. That would be bad...

Therefore, we did the most logical, most inspirational, most smartiest thing possible:

We continued walking.

With the cute little pup at our heels.

People looked curiously at us through car windows. I saw this one Chinese family actually point -- not that I blame them. Two, very Malay, looking girls with one, very doggy looking dog, was a queer sight to behold, I am sure.

Nonetheless, we shrugged it off -- well, I did, anyways. I could practically see the wheels turn in Sofie's head. Probably figuring out a way to get rid of the "pesky mutt".

Finally, a road. A road needed to be crossed.

Our CHANCE!

Sofia and I took no mercy. We ran across to the other side. Hoping the pup would not follow us because:

a) Sofia didn't seem to like said pup

and

b) I was afraid I might be unable to resist the temptation to snatch said pup into my hands, rush it home, and keep her as my own. Questioning eyes and glares and gossip be damned!

Well. Whatever.

Our running proved pointless, it seemed because, in the end, I realized:

Cheerful yapping.

Shoot. It followed us.

And, damn, it looked so HAPPY!

"Shoo! Shoo!" went Sofie, backing off before the pup would circle her feet like it did mine (I am guilty of feeling very pleased by such a fact, by the way).

Tough luck.

It circled her.

And in turn,

Sofie did a little 360 herself. Screaming in the process. It was almost (I'm so sorry, Sofia!)... funny. If, of course, it hadn't been for the fact that:

a) the pup had STILL followed us

and

b) I really, REALLY wanted her!!!

Sofie screaming. Sofie screaming. Sofie...

OMG.

She, in her process of 360-ing on the road over to our house, had (ACCIDENTALLY, of course!), kicked the puppy!

"Yap, yap!" went the pup, looking more insulted than pissed or saddened (as one would expect it to be).

"OMG, OMG!" went Sofia, feeling automatically sorry. "I didn't mean that!"

We screamed.

Yes. WE.

I screamed too. Don't know why. But the look on that dirty little girl's face as she was kicked into the dirt ground was so real and so sad that I just HAD to do something (and that something just happened to be scream).

The pup seemed a bit resentful of Sofia after that. Choosing to follow me instead (to my innermost glee!), before...

"Thats right, puppy, follow the car," went Sofia, satisfied for the puppy as it followed its next victim.

I sighed. Two reasons:

a) I was relieved.

and

b) I was upset to have lost my very idealistic pet.

Well, thats it, I guess. The story of the little pup that followed us home. I really have GOT to finish packing (/stuffing). I have SO much more to do and, hey, guess what! We're moving... to-freaking-morrow!

UGH.

My mum is SO going to kill me...

-

-

-

Gosh, I hope the puppy is all right.

REVELATIONS

After browsing through, like about, a dozen blogs, I decided, "ehh... why not? Logging in isn't THAT much of a hassle." After all, I told myself: "Might as well savor it while it lasts; by next Friday, there will be no internet!"

If, at all there are any, readers here wondering what exactly I MEAN by me having no internet come next Friday; a stunning revelation I will now announce in my post today:

Come next Friday, I, Noor Hannah bt Mohd Nasir, will no longer be living in Aranda.

Come next Friday, I, Noor Hannah bt Mohd Nasir will be...

MOVING!!

Yeah, thats right, people: I'm moving. And, finally! We've been going back and forth from the new house to the current for centuries, its high time, I believe, we pack our belongings and move in FOR REAL.

Meep -- Can't wait, really. The airconditioning, Astro, rabbit fencing, lightings, paint jobs, renovation works, and overall house is all set -- my only problem would be the lack of internet (sob).

So, really, as I said earlier before: I shall now savor what is left of my highspeed connection before moving to a much larger internet-free house. Damn. What SHALL I do to occupy my time there anyways, I wonder?

--

--

PS: Yesterday, I just cut my hair. You'll be surprised by the new look (I know I am!).

Now Playing

Hey. Some of you might be wondering why I hadn't been blogging for quite awhile. I guess, in a way, you can say that I was busy -- but truth be told, a more appropriate answer to that would be that I was too lazy to login. I know: L.O.L. moment, isn't it?

Haven't been in the mood to blog lately as well -- seeing how I only blog when feeling devastatingly down and neurotically emo. For quite some time now I have been lulling myself to sleep with soft, soothing, happy music. Its kind of an experiment of mine -- to test whether or not music truly DOES effect your personality/attitude.

I think, in a way, it sort of kind of is working... if but a little.

I have been waking up from bed happily. Am able to do my chores without complaint. Have been studying without force from my parents.

...so, yeah.

Jason Mraz's, "I'm Yours", really DOES do wonders for the soul.

Currently, I am sick. Hadn't been able to go to tuition yesterday. And also... erm... it was report card day today. Did badly, of course (surprise, surprise!). Hopefully this is the last time. Next time I must force myself to do better.

Anyways, if you're wondering what songs I have been sleeping to, here ya go. Feel free to get them yourself. They may not suit your tastes, of course, but they really are pretty if you gave em a chance.


Jason Mraz-- I'm Yours

A Fine Frenzy-- Almost Lover

Aaron Carter (wtf, right?)-- Do You Remember

Leona Lewis-- Take a Bow

Rihanna feat Justin Timberlake-- Rehab

Secondhand Solitaire-- Why

The Fray-- Look After You

James Blunt-- 1973

James Blunt-- Carry You Home

James Blunt-- Tears and Rain

Regina Spektor-- The Call

Sydney Frost-- Once in a Blue Moon

...err... well, maybe they aren't that un-emo. Soothing nonetheless, though, right??

...yeah.

Music is...?

We're going to Langkawi tomorrow. I don't know whether or not I should be happy. I'm not that into... leaving the house and going places... and stuff. Not that I'm anti-social, of course. I mean, okay, a BIT anti-social, but... yeah, okay, y'know what? Whatever. DROPPING the subject.

Haha.

I'm listening to Snow Patrol's "Run" right now; and I must say, the song is very nice. Not the chorus as much, of course, but I love the mood in which the singer puts it. Its, like, sad and hopeful and... hopeless at the same time. I imagine the atmosphere in terms of "before parting". Its beautiful, really.

Which brings me to my topic of discussion for today (omg. she has TOPICS now?!):

Music.

I know how some people love the tune of the melody. The keys used. Perhaps even the type of music playing. The lyrics. The band/singer.

-but for me?

Its all about the story.

The story woven by a particular song is what fascinates me -- draws me in and make me melt.

What I mean to say is; the whole package in general. The voice of the singer gives tone; depth. Lyrics draw the scene; the expression of the characters. The melody/tune denotes the atmosphere -- the mood in that particular moment.

All in all, this song, "Run", draws (in my conclusion anyways) a very beautiful story.

I can imagine the main characters crying. Reminiscing. Embracing. Falling apart. Breaking.

Good stuff.

Music to me does not mean life. It does not mean, in my opinion, there is no life without music.

It just means life without the presence of music would be an unusual one. Perfect. Neutral. Boring.

Music to me is an expression. A feeling. Sensations. Whether one chooses to express such feelings by belching it out; screaming it out; rapping about it; drawling over it... that paints the picture. Makes the listener UNDERSTAND and RELATE.

See, thats why I don't have a favorite genre of music. Am not particular of bands and singers and whatnot.

I love music. Music itself.


For music, you see; is passion.

It doesn't matter how bad you sing; how horrible you play -- if you have a feeling, express it. Don't let anybody stop you because no two songs are the same. No one song, even though re-sung by two different singers; paints the same picture.

Therefore,

I guess what I'm trying to say here is:

Inject music into your veins. Your body. Your entire soul.

Taste the passion.

Numerology

After stomping around, shaking off my sudden, unexplainable surge of anger; I was bored and was surfing the web. Lo and behold, people: I found myself, face-to-screen with this awesome thing called, numerology!

Its wicked cool.

They did this survey of my full name and I got this awesome in-depth result of my expression (which is, like, my unique out-take on the world and what I feel I must do as long as I'm still here), my soul urge (which is, like, the one thing in my heart and soul desperately yearns for; though nobody would actually know it) and, finally, my personality (which is how other people see me.

Coolio, right?

I've got my results right here, too! Check it:

Expression: 105 / 6
Family and home life are your main interests. You know how to nurture and accept anyone, therefore, many are drawn to you including those that others call, "strays". You have an eye for anything beautiful and your home is sure to reflect this, no matter what your budget is. You are proud of all your possessions and especially of the talents of your family members. Your generous, creative nature makes you the ideal host or guest at a party.

Soul Urge: 30 / 3
Your urge is to bring hope, joy and beauty to all you meet. You feel the best when you are in beautiful and comfortable surroundings. You have a creative essence and use your inspiration and imagination to make others happy. You enjoy attention and admiration, and you desire recognition for your talents.

Personality: 75 / 12 / 3
There seems to be a golden glow of optimism and joy around you wherever you go. You are witty and playful, and your idealistic nature irresistibly draws the little child out of everyone you meet. Ever creative and interesting to talk to, you are never long without people to cluster around your radiance. You enjoy dressing up and are very creative with accessories. You've got a style all your own, even if you don't follow fashion.

----

also, I did this birth purpose numerology test -- in which they had surveyed my birthdate. Not to say, of course, that I believe in all this phooey-balooey stuff totally 100%, but, definitely; it WAS interesting.

Sad to say, though; for both my results (my name survey and birth survey), I was not as impressed as I would like to have been. I mean, I always hoped I was destined for greater thing -- WORLDLY things, y'know? But based on the results, it seems: I'm just this homebody type person; who's main priority is merely family and friends.

Check it:

Fairness, compassion and comfort are the gifts you are here to bestow. Those needing care and nurturing will naturally be drawn to you. Whether it be human or animal it is your destiny to empathize, heal and resolve conflict. You have all of the tools to make your world a more beautiful and loving place. Domestic responsibility, aesthetic arts, and fair judgment are some of the qualities you are here to express.

As the higher octave of the number 6, "master number" 33 is the number of compassion. It is called the Christ vibration and requires self-sacrifice, courage and unwavering commitment to reform , truth and healing. You are on a "mission", and other teachers will learn from your honesty, discipline and bravery. You are here to provide sustenance for the hungry, whether it be through food, beauty, education, ministry or medicine. Yours is the path of "savior".

The Life Path is divided into 3 great cycles, each governing us for specific durations throughout our life. The Seed Cycle begins at birth and colors our experiences through childhood and adolescence. During the year nearest our 28th birthday, we move into the Fruit Cycle which remains throughout the middle part of our life until the year nearest our 56th birthday, and the Harvest Cycle carries on from there. Taken all together, the Cycles show us the particular path, a sort of 'minor life path', that will lead to the fulfillment of our Life Purpose.

Seed Cycle: 7

When the 7 is the seed cycle, the child may spend much of their time alone, with their books and their ideas. Others may view them as unusual in some way. If encouraged and allowed, the 7 seed cycle can create a genius or child prodigy.

Fruit Cycle: 6

This cycle is about responsibility, duty, and serving one's fellow man. This nurturing is usually begun at home, as domesticity gives the 6 much pleasure. Beauty and harmony are sought and even fought for. The 6 may have a career as a decorator, beautician, chef, nurse or landscape architect. The most important thing during this cycle, however, is the maintaining of a happy and harmonious home life.

Harvest Cycle: 2
"Togetherness" is the theme of this cycle. You are unlikely to be alone because this is a phase of your life when partnership and sensitivity are being mastered. You are a natural networker - matching up friends with the things they need and it's the simple, yet precious joys in life that matter to you now. People, emotional connections and cooperative efforts are your priorities.


----

I checked some of my friends and family members numerology out, too. Won't tell you the results, of course (they may want to keep it a secret!), but... I will say this:

their birth purposes, expressions and soul urge seem a WHOLE lot better than MINE ever did.

(like, sob, much?)

My crazy attempt at love poetry: #2! I've been doing literature; studying texts and poems lately, so, me being me, I had to, at least, try my luck at it. Result? Failure. Complete, utter failure. I tried to make myself sound "mature", tried to inject myself with that sense of... age-old... antiquity... but, alas: the "s" in loser stands not for "success", but for "stupidity". How stupid am I to write something I have no understanding of? Something I have no passion for? The answer to that -- very. Haha.

I took pleasure,

first, in the way he held me

arms wrapping,

as if i was some sort of gift

meant for royalty

loved him

second,

in the way he would say my name,

tender lips grazing the soft edges

of my feverish cheeks,

long, graceful fingers

swooping my face upwards,

brushing me carefully,

as if i was some sort of great art

and he would hold me there

in his embrace.

with one look he made me

weaken, tumble and fall

flat on my back,

eyes wide,

breath short and ragged,

watching,

for he would look at me in that certain way

and there, he had it

had me,

all to himself

and he knew

(oh, yes. he was very certain)

That in those moments,

or whichever moments relevant,

i would allow it

allow anything

the breaking of my mind, my body

my soul.

i am not a gentle person,

not a leaf-lover or holder of hands,

am not romantic

will never be soft and sweet

like those precious girls

dressed in earthly feminity

and godly grace

but for him

for him,

i am willing

and i would allow it

for him,

i would be that porcelain doll

in the antique window

that porcelain doll i had

broken

many years ago.

him.

he was so much
while i was nothing.
he could walk bare-footed, eyes to the clouds
clothed in rag and dirt and grime
yet the stars would still shine upon him
and i would still watch,
through half-lidded eyes and tightly shut lips
the gentle wind caress his much-stroked face
the quite moon highlight his glowing eyes
as if i did not see them well enough

that disgusting, beautiful man
for he was a man
amongst boys and girls with their dolls
he was a man
amongst children and toys and sweets and smiles
he saw the world as what it was
had seen the grim
had tasted tears
he was well-worn
and often (for i am not ashamed to admit this)
i looked up to him

i wanted him
wanted him so badly,

but mostly?

i wanted to be him

i am a foolish, selfish little girl
a girl that would never understand the world through
a man’s eyes
through his eyes

for,
indeed,

he was a man.

he was a man among boys and girls and laughs and toys,
he was a man, even,

among men.

for,
as mentioned,
he had seen the world
for what it truly was

he saw me, once, too
from within his shadow
gave me one good, long look
and then...
turned away.

for,
like i’d said,
he is a man

and who am i to deny
the whim of such?
for i am but a girl
and as such,
have much left to see.